Here is a contest for you

which of these videos is the most amazing

A tribute to a king

Go with God's Speed Billy Mays

what can you find here?

I have the answer to that!

Just like the federal reserve my mission is two fold but singly focused.

You can find videos here. Sometimes they are funny because I found them funny and want to share. Usually I will point out the funniest thing I found in them. Like yesterday. Video was a wee bit stupid but I actually LOL'd when I saw the guy spilling his "guts" out. Then I followed that up with one of the funniest all time online videos. That is the simple focus. Funny Videos. You can call me your tosh.0 or even better JENGA!.infinity. I am way better than that haxors noob. (I may not have my own show but at least I look better) (or maybe not)

This whole post is a good example of my second mission. Pontificating about crap. I am a very opinionated person. I like to express them. I like to win people over to my way of thinking. This is my medium. This is my calling. You are free not to read if you don't agree but just remember. I don't care if you don't read or agree. My opinions are mine and though I would prefer that you agree with them (thereby telling me that I wasn't a waste of sperm). I am not a hypocrite. If you have a view on something I appreciate if you don't force it on me. If you say you don't want me to force my views on you then don't read. If you think I am proselytising (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=proselytising) on TS then and want me to stop let me know and I will.

OKAY! enough heavy chit and big words.

I watched Gran Torino on Friday and have been thinking about it since. It is a really good movie but I don't know what is funnier, the scene about talking like a man or the fact that Clint Eastwood talks out loud to himself the whole movie:



The best part about this movie has to do with the fact that it really speaks to me concerning relationships between parents and children. Like the following script snippet which happened in my prime (which I am well past now):

ANDREW
What's the deal?

ALLISON
No! There's no deal, Sporto.
Forget it, leave me alone.

ANDREW
Wait a minute, now you're carrying
all that crap around in your purse.
Either you really wanna run away or
you want people to think you wanna
run away.

ALLISON
Eat shit!

Allison gets up and walks away.

BRIAN
The girl is an island, with herself.
Okay?

Andrew gets up and goes after her.

ANDREW
Hi, you wanna talk?

ALLISON
No!

ANDREW
Why not?

ALLISON
Go away...

ANDREW
Where do you want me to go?

ALLISON
GO away!

Andrew turns away and Allison starts to cry.

ALLISON
You have problems...

ANDREW
Oh, I have problems?

ALLISON
You do everything everybody ever
tells you to do, that is a problem!

ANDREW
Okay, fine...but I didn't dump my
purse out on the couch and invite
people into my problems...Did I?
So what's wrong? What is it? Is
is bad? Real bad? Parents?

Allison is silently crying.

ALLISON
Yeah...

Andrew nods.

ANDREW
What do they do to you?

ALLISON
They ignore me...

ANDREW
Yeah...yeah...

They both are crying silently.

Can you name the movie?

new classic video

Best part for me is when the guy is spilling out his "guts" I guess he had peanuts for lunch.


The Great Office War - Watch more Other Funny Stuff

And an old classic that always makes me think of Jonesy:


Hilarious Tech Support Call - Watch more Funny Videos

Too bad you can't arrange them by penis.

What is funnier?

The fact that this lady can't park? or how easily the guy just puts it in the spot?


Woman Can't Even Back Into Space - Watch more Funny Videos

And the emmy goes to...

In the catagory of "Special Thanks to:"

Crayon Hsien


Deadline: Cool Stop-Motion Post-It Art - Watch more Funny Videos

Walmart does have the best prices on tanks

I was flipping through the radio stations on XM and came across this one, sorry I couldn't find a better quality video:

worst sports injuries

Not for the squamish is Joe Theisman:


I personally think Tim Krumrie's break is worse, YouTube may agree, they took the video down.

and the keystone cops just for fun:

Paramedics Drop Injured Player - >Funny Videos

I don't know how injured that last guy was before the final insult, he did after all get on the stretcher himself.

Here's to you Mystic

Backyard Slingshot Sends Squirrel Flying - Watch more Funny Videos


Squirrel launcher - Watch more Funny Videos


Skip The Squirrel Hunter - Watch more Funny Videos

Who is the best football team in Ohio?

Is it the Browns?



Obviously not.

Has to be the Bengals then, right?



Okay, so maybe they are delusional also and aren't even in the running.




And the winner is:

Lets look at the numbers real quick:
Browns and Bengals have a combined 4 and none since 1964.
Buckeyes have 7 with the latest being in 2002.

I don't think we need to look further do we?

All the beautiful people

Hot Model Falls Off Catwalk Into Pool - Watch more Funny Videos


Runway model falls - duck walk - Watch more Funny Videos


Model falls, girl owned twice - Watch more Funny Videos

Why don't we have these in CoH yet?

I mean, OTHER than because they didn't exist in ww2?


Cold War Era Russian Screw Tanks

oops

BaDa BING!

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

It's finally here!

I feel as though it were Christmas, my birthday and prostate exam day all combined!

What is it you wonder? Well, it's BING! the new search enging from microsoft!

I used it once so far, looked up snapple just for kicks. It is a clone of google when you see the results. Well, then you read the results and see the difference. They both seem to start off with the same way with the wiki and the company site but the bing has a full page of crap for facebook, twitter, etc and google gives you more stuff about the stuff. Not sure what snapple is going to twitter but I'm sure it has to be great because microsoft said I should go there.

anywho, here is a tribute to a bing worth mentioning:

Public service messages

Too bad the wusses that think this is offensive don't sometimes take their own advice. Here are the funniest ones I can find:

Talk To Your Kids About Sex - Watch more Funny Commercials

Hey Slick, weren't you talking about cleveland steamers the other night? Have you talked to your kids yet?

Seriously, is there anything worse? Wouldn't you want to know from your parents first?

Again Slick, can you help us out? Any ideas on how lighter fluid to use?

Finally,

Funny Hammer Pants Flash Mob - Watch more Funny Videos

My favorite band

Okeydokey den

Here is some good chit, and just for Dis, some headbands too:

And the headbands at their heights:

Dire Straits |MTV Music

Dis' rant

Now, I don't know much about the history of a band that was once had questions about its sexual orientation due to its name but I thought I would post portions in blue of what disallowed has to say about this subject:

There have been rumors lately of the Federal government giving handouts to Music corporations, ... so with this in mind I beg of you, please let this incarnation of the music "Industry" die.

Why you ask?
Exhibit A - 1976 a band get up on the back of a flatbed truck, and drive down the main road of Australia's 2nd largest city, no police escort, they stopped for traffic lights, people (back then) looked on in bemusement as they mimed, etc, ... a ONE time drive for the film clip. A classic is made!
Exhibit B - 1977 same band film a song in a church, the lead singer sings from the pulpit, the rest of the band dress as altar boys, they belt out one of the greatest EVER rock n roll songs, the lead singer even jumps off the pulpit about 4 1/2 minutes into the clip and BROKE his right leg, they left that in the clip!

The band here is AC-DC:



This music was made without millions of dollars, no stylists, video's made with no director, recorded with minimal fuss ... And even today, after 30 years, it makes you go "HELL YEAH!" ... much like the other classic music Jenga has posted here!


I've had enough of Britney and Jason Timberlake thanks to the "industry". Kill the boy-bands, the girl-bands, and bring back the head-bands that hold back the hair of the people who play so hard, they don't have time to "look good"!

The music will never die,
whether the billion dollar label like it or not, ...
they can't stop the Jam sessions,
they can't stop 20 assorted lifelong musicians gathering every Saturday afternoon at the Intermission on Pittsburgh's SouthSide,
they can't stop Johnnie Smooth from belting out ridiculous saxophone solos that attract fellow sax players from New York and Chicago,
they can't stop an 82 year old guy with cancer, named Chizmo from singing "Cold Sweat" by James Brown (or hitting on the ladies).

THEY CAN'T STOP IT, because they never started it, the musicians did and the fans supported it.
You can't stop the music ... Hmmmm, a good name for a song ...

(If you noticed "Jason Timberlake" ... SHAME ON YOU!!)

I'm kind of disappointed that he made no mention of trying to make bagpipes mainstream. I also want to mention that Timbergay's voice is higher pitched than Himney's.

corrections and chit

It seems I mis-typed in an earlier post. Ringo Starr is the voice of Thomas the Tank Engine so he is still alive. Sorry about the jinx there Ringo.

I also want to make a quick announcement.

I am going to start a thread in the forums called J-Tube Rants where you can post replies, comments, dissention, rhetoric and comments to my posts. I would ask that at no time do you actually post real facts as that is not the basis nor intent of my blog. Just kidding, put in whatever you want, especially if it is a Tom's mom joke.

Now something for you younger kids:

It's Whack-A-Kitty! - Watch more Funny Videos